The Spammers run from Cable

SPAMMERS

Membership: Go-Go (Asahiri Aoki), Sauerkraut (Gunther Herschein), T-5 (Tuatola T'Tuana Timōn)

Purpose: Anarchy, mayhem

Affiliations: None

Enemies: Hans Beimer, Cable, One World Church, Sunic Pharmacopoeia

Base of Operations: Mobile across Germany, especially Frankfurt

First Appearance: Cable/Deadpool#1 (May, 2006)

History:

(Cable/Deadpool#2 (fb) - BTS) - The Spammers comprised three normal human college graduates who shared a common philosophy of anarchy and chaos. T-5 managed to hack into Sunic Pharmacopoeia, which was working on an apparent designed cosmetic gene. They set out to steal the Façade virus bioweapon from Sunic's German plant in an effort to thwart the apparent pharmaceutical corporate attack on individuality. The three somehow made it past security and ingested the virus, although the virus' release triggered its horrific effects on those nearby, including the plant manager, Hans Beimer.

(Cable/Deadpool#1) - The three thieves fled away from Deadpool and Cable, passing the latter in the corridor.

(Cable/Deadpool#2) - Cable reached the breached containment area and questioned the dying Beimer, who told the mutant that the virus had been stolen. Cable then recalled the three civilians who had rushed past him before.

   Back at their Frankfurt apartment, the three anarchists relaxed with U.S. Army surplus ordnance nearby, calling each other by their email codenames. Sauerkraut vomited from the effects of swallowing the virus as T-5 played a video game, while Go-Go was in the bathroom, finding the virus' initial morphic abilities kicking in, and she manipulated her face to resemble that of Hillary Clinton. Go-Go then directed her friends to spread discord. Meanwhile, Cable telepathically searched for them.

   Cable finally found Sauerkraut masquerading as a prominent Hollywood actor and who was seducing four women to have sex with him. Nearby, the mutant hero found T-5 looking like the Chinese basketballer Yao Ming and telling children of his anti-corporate philosophy. He later found Go-Go pretending to be Hillary Clinton, appearing unexpectedly on a chat show to talk about fascist U.S. global policies. Cable then asked his ally at the Daily Bugle newspaper, Irene Merryweather, to investigate the group.

   Briefly distracted by Deadpool, Cable ripped into a Frankfurt hotel room where Sauerkraut lay on the bed, literally dissolving from the effects of the virus while the women stood distraught. Cable mentally tried to read the virus' composition before the German died. Cable then found T-5, whose body was deteriorating as he fired a machine gun into a crowd in an effort to kill people as he died. Cable stopped him and again "read" the virus as the anarchist dissolved under the lethal effects of the virus.Nearby, Go-Go blasted cars with a missile launcher but Cable telekinetically zoomed in, disarmed her and extracted the Façade virus from within her, saving her from disintegration.

(Cable/Deadpool#6 (fb) - BTS) - Irene Merryweather found that Go-Go had been incarcerated in a Frankfurt prison.

Comments: Created by Fabian Nicieza (writer) and Mark Brooks (pencils & inks).

   The references to a samurai acting role and the movie Minority Report suggest that Sauerkraut's disguise was that of actor Tom Cruise. The translation of Sauerkraut's codename comes from the comic book.

   It's interesting how despite their personal philosophy of anarchy and anti-multinational corporate greed, they still indulged in fast food, gaming platforms and magazines from multinational firms. The three also evidently spoke fluent German and English.

Profile by Grendel Prime.

CLARIFICATIONS:
The Spammers have no known connections to:

Go-Go has no known connections to:
Sauerkraut has no connections to:
T-5 has no known connections to:

Go-Go changes her look

Go-Go

Asahiri Aoki was a college graduate who took on the email moniker of Go-Go. Along with her friends, Gunther Herschein and Tuatola T'Tuana Timōn, she sought to sow anarchy and mayhem by helping to steal the Façade virus from Sunic Pharmacopoeia's German plant, managing to escape past Cable and Deadpool. She consumed a small part of the virus, which could make her body malleable. Aoki then changed her appearance to look like Senator Hillary Clinton and demonstrated the virus' effects to her two friends. After changing their appearances, all three went out and began fomenting discord, with Go-Go imitating Senator Clinton on a TV chat show. She was monitored by Cable, who then confronted her as she was blowing up cars using a missile launcher. Having learnt about the lethal composition of the Façade virus from her hapless colleagues, Cable was able to telekinetically extract it from Aoki and thereby cure her before the virus could kill her.

   She was later held in a Frankfurt prison.

 

 

 

 

 

 

--Cable/Deadpool#1 (2,6 (fb) - BTS


Sauerkraut stains the sheets

Sauerkraut

Gunther Herschein was a German college graduate who had read a paper on anarchy written by Tuatola T'Tuana Timōn (T-5). He adopted the codename of Sauerkraut ("Sour Kraut": angry German) and hooked up with two others to spread anarchy and mayhem by helping to steal the Façade virus from Sunic Pharmacopoeia's German plant, managing to escape past Cable and Deadpool. He felt very sick after swallowing the virus and later molded his appearance to resemble that of a well-known actor in order to seduce several women. However, his body began to dissolve in the hotel room where Cable rushed in to help him, but the mutant hero was too late. Cable mentally read the composition of the virus within the German. Herschein told Cable he was in severe pain and Cable killed him to take the pain away.

 

 

 

 

 

--Cable/Deadpool#1 (2


T-5 about to get hammered by Cable

T-5

Tuatola T'Tuana Timōn was a college graduate and political activist who adopted the name of T-5. He wrote a paper on "military-business pharmogilopoly", which was read by Sauerkraut and later Cable. He hacked into Sunic Pharmacopoeia's computer systems and found out about the Façade virus before setting out to take it in a misguided effort to stop the would-be corporate assimilation of individuality. He met up with two other anarchists and helped steal the Façade virus from Sunic's German plant, managing to escape past Cable and Deadpool. After seeing Go-Go's self-manipulated physical change in appearance, he took on the likeness of the Chinese basketballer Yao to spread the word of anarchy among children. However, his body began to slowly and painfully dissolve from the effects of the virus, so he opened fire on nearby people, no longer seeing anyone as innocent, but his bullets were halted in mid-air by Cable. As the anarchist died, Cable was able to determine more of the make-up of the deadly virus.

 

 

 

 

 

--Cable/Deadpool#1 (2


images: (without ads)
Cable/Deadpool#1, p20, pan1 (group)
Cable/Deadpool#2, p6, pan6 (Go-Go)

p13, pan3 (Sauerkraut)
p16, pan3 (T-5)


Appearances:
Cable/Deadpool#1-2 (May-June, 2006) - Fabian Nicieza (writer), Mark Brooks (pencils & inks), Tom Brevoort (editor)


Last updated: 08/23/08.

Any Additions/Corrections? please let me know.

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